Relationships: 1+1=1

The Mathematics Of Wholeness

Over the last few weeks various discussions have arisen in the Facebook group The Dating Circle, but the more comments I see the more I’m realising how much we (as a race) don’t fully understand the meaning of true love and being whole. I’m a massive believer that a person must be happy and whole within their being, in order to have a truly happy and fulfilled relationship. I’ve touched upon this in afew other posts, but whilst out walking I got the idea for this post to further help people (me and everyone else who is in need of alittle guidance) visualise the meaning of ‘wholeness’ and the importance of it when journeying towards true love.

If we compare people to single cells and imagine we’re looking under a microscope. Imagine us (as individuals) each represent one cell which is complete and whole, yet through conditioning we’ve ended up feeling that half of our wholeness/fulfilment is missing. Cells start out whole and when merged together, they still form a whole. There aren’t any half cells floating around looking for other half cells to complete them. 1 merges with 1 to make 1. We too must become whole again in order to find true happiness and true love. Most of us are unknowingly currently searching as half cells, looking for other half cells to complete us, but this isn’t the way it works. If you want a mediocre relationships where the spark fizzles out and you just exist like brother and sister or friends in the same household, then the half cell theory will work. But if you want the real deal, it’s important to focus on becoming whole again: becoming 1.

So many of us are looking far outside of our own being for love and happiness, looking for that someone special to complete us, to make us whole, that it’s becoming an exhausting struggle. One that I now see is out of desperation or loneliness. But one thing I know for sure, is that a relationship formed for the wrong reasons will not last and will still leave you feeling lost, empty and unfulfilled after some time. Why? Because each person must work on becoming whole, in order to have anything close to the real fairytale. Any anger, sadness, loniless, hurt or emotional blockages must be addressed or at least acknowledged for you to have the relationship of your dreams. Exploring these depths of the heart, will uncover true treasures and you’ll be overflowing with an abundance of love. Not only will you heal past hurts, but you’ll start to understand who you really are, what your soulmate looks like and what type of person you’d really like to spend the rest of your life with. Like attracts like. When you find the real you and become whole, will you attract the right person to add to your wholeness.

    Find the treasure at the bottom of your heart.

Like I always say…

‘I want the world to be in love, first with self, then with each other.’

Thank you to my lovely friend Maria for the title inspiration.




  1. datingshenanigansblog · January 11, 2016

    What an interesting analogy! I like it! Thank you! I do think, however, the ability to be happy alone does not define your success ina relationship. Sometimes people are so content alone that they fail at relationships too, unable to give their partner the attention and/or commitment they need.

    Liked by 1 person

    • heartofgold85 · January 11, 2016

      I’m glad you enjoyed reading and I absolutely agree. There’s always a flip side to what I’m saying. There are many different types of relationships, aswell as layers to a relationship but I feel to have a relationship that’s deeply connected (soulmate level) each individual should heal past issues. Healing has many positive affects and allows each person to connect deeper with themselves aswell as each other. I haven’t seen this type of connection in everyday relationships.
      If you’ve got anything to share I’d love to hear. I love talking about relationships.

      Liked by 1 person

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